shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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