so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
