Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
