with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
