Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
We named our party play list daddy issues
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
