Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
