Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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