awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
