Are we in a gay sports bar?
id be glad to
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
