Sry I called you an 8
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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