What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Help. Why am I so naked?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
