Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
