dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
