toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
