So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
