Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
