Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
