i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
