Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
