Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
