we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
