hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
