so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
