Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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