does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Randomize