Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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