didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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