found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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