fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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