Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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