i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
whose ass print is on the piano?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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