Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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