apparently the secret to your success is patron
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
this hospital has no fireball
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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