Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
