Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize