Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Randomize
