break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
