In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
