We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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