who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
