I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
