they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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