I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
