You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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