In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
