I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Randomize
