i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
