Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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