why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I just forgot I was standing up.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
