dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
